Re: Your favourite joke from a comedian? : Thu Nov 07, 2013 7:46 pm  

Ferocious Aardvark wrote:

One of the funniest men I've ever seen was Les Dawson.

I couldn't tell you what I think is his funniest joke, but here's a couple:

"I’ve got a friend who's a lion tamer. He used to be a school teacher, until he lost his nerve."

"The people next door are awful. At three o’clock this morning they were banging on the walls and screaming. Good job I wasn’t trying to sleep — I was playing my drums at the time."

"My wife sent her photograph to the lonely hearts club. They sent it back, said they weren’t that lonely."

"The mother-in-law is so ugly, when she goes on holiday, the mosquitoes draw lots to see who is going to bite her"

Another one was, "I always knew when the mother in law was coming round, the mice threw themselves on the traps."

Re: Your favourite joke from a comedian? : Thu Nov 07, 2013 9:56 pm  

Ferocious Aardvark wrote:

"The mother-in-law is so ugly, when she goes on holiday, the mosquitoes draw lots to see who is going to bite her"

Oh, thank you. I've nearly snorted Aussie Red over my keyboard (quality).

Doddy for me, every time.
No one particular joke stood out for me (I've seen him twice), just the RELENTLESS stream of fantastic gags.

The world will be a sadder place when Doddy goes "upstairs". The word genius is overused, these days. On Doddy, it doesn't do him duty.

Re: Your favourite joke from a comedian? : Thu Nov 07, 2013 11:02 pm  

Not stand up but...

Basil Fawlty: Manuel put it on those trays.
Manuel: No no Mr Fawlty. Unos, dos, tres.


or

Father Ted: Right, one more time. These are small, but the ones out there are far away.... Small.... Far away.


As for Spike Milligan, his imagination and creativity in comedy was ahead of his time. Listen to old Goons recordings. Not everyone's cup of tea. A lot of funny people have credited him as being their inspiration. Then again if you watch the programme Curry & Chips you can see how he fell out of the mainstream

Re: Your favourite joke from a comedian? : Fri Nov 08, 2013 7:08 am  

Rooster Booster wrote:

As for Spike Milligan, his imagination and creativity in comedy was ahead of his time. Listen to old Goons recordings. Not everyone's cup of tea. A lot of funny people have credited him as being their inspiration. Then again if you watch the programme Curry & Chips you can see how he fell out of the mainstream

There is a very good biography written about him by his personal assistant of 30-odd (probably very odd) years, "Memories of Milligan" by Norma Farnes gives a lot of insight into his personal life and personal turmoil with life-long depression which he always attributed to his experiences as a gunner in Italy during WW2, his own written memoirs of that time tend to gloss over the real issues he had and try to put a funny spin on it.

A quote from her ...

The worst times were when he had the black dog: he would lock himself in his room for days without coming out. I would leave a little note halfway under the door when I went home and in the morning it would still be there. But a few days later I’d find a note on the door saying, 'F*** off, leave me alone’ and I knew he would be getting better. A few days later I would hear his typewriter going again and I’d think, 'Oh good, he’s up and about.’

His contemporaries, the comedians and other script writers that he worked with speak of his generosity too, for instance he'd bought a house in central London just to work in and write by himself but after setting up his own and Norma Farnes' office he was left with several upstairs rooms and so would let aspiring writers use them cheaply or for free as long as they didn't disturb him downstairs, the comedy writers Galton and Simpson and also Eric Sykes became long term residents there.

A line from him as a review of a not-very-good comedian that he'd seen : "He left an indelible blank on my mind,"

Re: Your favourite joke from a comedian? : Fri Nov 08, 2013 7:55 am  

Rooster Booster wrote:

... or

Father Ted: Right, one more time. These are small, but the ones out there are far away.... Small.... Far away ...

The number of times we've looked at each other and done the: "It's perspective" routine: we were half disappointed that Linehan hadn't shoehorned it into his stage version of The Ladykillers.

We also tend to find ourselves doing a version of the 'whipped' pronunciation routine between Stewie and Brian from Family Guy.

Re: Your favourite joke from a comedian? : Fri Nov 08, 2013 2:20 pm  

At the other end of the spectrum, I went to a cricket club's annual dinner where the "turn" was Norman Collier. His most famous routine was playing a club's MC with a broken mic. Unfortunately on this occasion Collier's mic genuinely was faulty and kept cutting out, but not of course at the right places. Completely ruined his act, after 10 mins he sat down with his head in his hands.

[John_D]

Re: Your favourite joke from a comedian? : Fri Nov 08, 2013 2:41 pm  

As opening lines go, the bloke who did the Leeds ex-players dinner a few years ago had a pretty good one, as Jerry Chicken will attest to.

Thanks very much. I nearly didn't make it here tonight because I came on the bus. It's alright though - I made it look like an asthma attack.


The rest of the turn was utterly forgettable

Re: Your favourite joke from a comedian? : Fri Nov 08, 2013 3:31 pm  

John_D wrote:

As opening lines go, the bloke who did the Leeds ex-players dinner a few years ago had a pretty good one, as Jerry Chicken will attest to.

Thanks very much. I nearly didn't make it here tonight because I came on the bus. It's alright though - I made it look like an asthma attack.

There are times and situations and often involve drink, where you find yourself sat at a table of hysteria, when he told that joke there was a quiet ripple of laughter to start with, then ten seconds later the laughter started and then I can't remember any other joke that he told but I do remember thinking that if I kept on laughing much longer I was going to be sick, what with all that banoffee pie I'd eaten, and everything.

Re: Your favourite joke from a comedian? : Fri Nov 08, 2013 7:39 pm  

Slightly paraphrased to make it comply with the AUP.

My father died making love. He did. My father was 57 when he died. The woman was 18. My father came and went at the same time.

Richard Pryor

Re: Your favourite joke from a comedian? : Fri Nov 08, 2013 8:42 pm  

86 today.

Happy Birthday, Doddy